Mar 25, 2012

mental health day

Today I have declared for myself a "mental health" day. It's unlike me to skip out on church but I got permission from the big Man, well sorta, I think He understands especially coming out of the week I just endured.
This past week has been filled with more drama than I care to ever experience again. It seems like the more I tell myself that I hate drama, the more it keeps appearing in my life. Just when you think you know someone, they make choices and tell lies that reveal who they really are. I have had to find out things that have made me so mad and frustrated disappointed and sad. As I sit here today, I am pretty much done with the two people who caused a lot of commotion and upheaval. I don't plan to interact with them anytime soon.
We have a temporary house guest until Friday. Bill's dad had drama with his alcoholic roommate and is going to find another place to stay. On the flip side, my dad was going to be moved to a rehab facility on Wed. which was the worst of all days for me to be somewhere because I already had a full day of appointments. 
I got to my dad as soon as I could to gather his belongings before they moved him to another facility. I was so busy on Wed. that I forgot about going to PT and that is so not like me either. Later that day, my brother called and said he was in the hospital too. I told him I would try to come by but he's at least an hour away. In the meantime, I am searching for a van similar to mine, oh yeah, I was dealing with insurance to get a check so I could purchase another vehicle before school starts up again. So I got the check on Thursday and we had to drive all the way to Cool Springs to get it cashed b/c my bank puts a five day hold on that amount of money. Luckily, we were going south to Murfreesboro to see my brother and look at a van, it just took forever to get all of that done. Thursday night brought a small reprieve from Cub Scout duties and they all went bowling. We ate a late dinner with fiends and that was nice. Friday, I spent the day getting things ready for a church Spring Fling for kids. Thinking we were going to have about fifty kids, I ran around to a bazillion Dollar General markets looking for plant trays for an outdoor craft. Anyway, I spent about 3 hours Friday night, putting candy bags together, decorating and organizing all the details for Saturday.  I spent most of Saturday at the church putting the final touches on a fantastic fling for lots of kids and then it decided to rain for a good thirty minutes and about fifteen kids show up. WOW! don't think I'll do that again. I always feel cursed when I try to plan stuff like that, Oh well, you live, you learn.
I came home after all that and cooked the first dinner this month, I think. I just wanted to be home and do what I wanted to do. So today on the last Sunday of March, I declare a metal health day. I am using this day to do what I want to do and NOT what everyone else needs from me. A friend of mine told me this week that I need to stop taking care of everyone else and take care of me first. It's much easier said than done but I have to keep telling myself that it's okay to say no and not feel guilty because others can't accept no from me either. Tomorrow we all go back to school and resume our weekly routines. I just feel jipped that this Spring Break wasn't anything like I wanted or needed. I hope people will take their drama and leave me alone. I miss my drama free life.

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